Jay Leno 10/29/11 Majestic

So after I rushed out from Jane Lynch, I sped down the highway to get Downtown.  I wanted to be there in time to get Jay Leno before the show.

I get downtown and I vaguely knew where the Majestic theater is. Downtown Dallas isn’t that big, so if I get lost, it’s not a crisis but the shot clock is tick, tick, ticking. I find the place and now I’m looking for my fellow hounds. Seeing them will tell me I’m in the right spot and that I’m not late.  I haven’t tried to get anyone at the Majestic before so I don’t know the protocol, or the timing, or the sweet spot forgetting signatures.

After attempting to drive correctly down all the one way streets I see another collector. A small smile spreads across my lips. I know I’m not lost.  I now know where to stand.  Now, the question is where do I park? I’m hoping be in and out fairly quick.  I don’t want to pay but I would really like my car to still be there when it’s time to go home.

After I found a spot I collect my things and I can feel the tick tick tick of the clock clock clock.  I hustle to the stage door to find the area empty.  I missed my chance to get Leno before the show. The other collector is now gone. I’m by myself so I have no one to ask if he signed or if he would sign afterwards.

It’s still an hour before the show and I resign myself to a wait.  I have a dim hope for some reason Leno might pop out to get something from the car and I might get lucky - but in reality, it looks like it will be after the show. I’ll be here for another 3 hours or so.

So I stand. I try not to look like a vagrant or junkie. I don’t lean on the wall. I keep a silly smile plastered on my face and I wait with my clipboard in hand and Sharpie at the ready.  Now the tick tick tick of the clock clock clock is in slow motion. How is fickle the speed of time.

After 45 minutes or so my feet and lower back hurt as much as that stupid smile I’m wearing. The stage door opens and a man comes out. My slouch straightens and my grin gets bigger. I want to make a good impression, even if he’s not Jay Leno.

The man looks me over and sees the clipboard. He knows what I am. He smiles and tells me Jay is already inside. I nod and mutter something like I figured.  He said I might want to go back to my car and come back in 2 hours; after the show is over.  I thank him for the advice.  I asked if he Jay signed on the way in and he said, yes and he added that Jay was very pleasant.

So with aching feet I start back to the car.  Then the guy starts talking. Then we talk. He’s an interesting guy.  After 30 minutes of conversation, he reminds me to come back later.  Then he talks some more.  After another 30 minutes I’m wondering if I should just hang out and talk with him for the rest of the time.  He really was interesting to talk with.

But my back convinces me to go sit in the car.  I wait.

I come back an hour later. Another couple is waiting and we chit chat to pass the time. After 30 minutes another pair of people arrived. So there are 5 of us.

The Jay Leno arrived.

He pretended to be surprised that people are waiting. He smiled and accepted a stack of photos for one person.  He signed the photos and moved to me and I hand over my clip board.  He signed 2 photos for me and then moved to the next person

I then mentioned that I heard he recently bought a Cord to add to his car collection.  He paused at the non-sequitur.  He told me he had bought one a few years back.  I wanted to carry on a conversation about the car but sadly I didn’t have more to say.  Yes, I should have listened to my dad better.

He had finished signing for all of us and he got in his car.  Then a teenager came running around the corner of the building shouting for an autograph.  Jay got out and signed. Then he posed for a few photos. A few more people wandered by and he signed and posed for more photos.

As Jay was posing, the lady with a camera was having trouble. Jay asked the guy he was stading with, if that was his mom. He said yes. Jay then laughed and said that’s the problem with the camera. You’re letting your mom try to take a photo. Jay then mentioned he knows this because he has a mom and she always has problems with the camera. He patiently waited and chatted as mom got the photo she wanted.

Jay signed a few more items and then got back in the car and drove off.

AH